(no subject)

[gone_byebye]

The door opens onto an alley in New York City. It nearly always does.

"We go around the front and into the Firehouse," Ray says. "The door tends to lock behind me when I head to Milliways. Don't worry, the guys are all used to me bringing home strangers."

Comments

[gone_byebye]

As far as Ray is concerned, there's nothing wrong with spending time in feathers. But his sisgter, well... she's normal, y'know?

"Not if you take your bathing seriously," Ray says as Alex grins. "This place has all kinds of bath bombs- they're the size of my fist. You drop them in the bath water and they fizz and hiss and turn the water colors and put all kinds of smells in the water and air. Some of 'em have glitter and stuff in them, too."

He looks at Raven thoughtfully.

"You know...."

[creator_raven]

Raven looks back, entirely unsuspicious.

"Glitter?"

This is innocence, right here.

Right.

Here.

. . . Right.

[gone_byebye]

"Oh, yeah," Ray says. "And there's stuff that you rub on your skin that leaves glitter behind, and stuff that sticks gold glitter in your hair. Or, you know, other people's skin and hair and stuff."

Alex is giving his uncle a suspicious look. In his limited experience, grown-ups don't put a lot of stock in glitter.

"Catherine likes the stuff they sell, so I figure if I buy her a gift box she'll be less mad at me. Wanna see their stuff?"

[creator_raven]

"Yes."

Raven's answer is remarkably prompt.

"It would, I think, be very interesting."

He grins down at Alex.

"It is a question of tricks, this."

Sort of.

[gone_byebye]

"Uncle Ray's not good at tricks."

"Quiet, Alex," Ray says firmly. "Okay. Let's get going."

He's not taking Ecto; she's impossible to find parking for. A taxicab will do just fine. Especially given how CROWDED the Herald Square area can be at this time of day. People EVERYWHERE. Vendors EVERYWHERE. Street crazies proclaiming the second coming of you name it. The smells of roasted meat on sticks and fried things and baked things and-

"There we are," says Ray. "That's LUSH."

[creator_raven]

Raven looks at it.

"It is very--"







"busy."

[gone_byebye]

"Popular place," Ray says. "Alex, Joey, you know the rule."

"No touching the ballistics," says Joey.

"No jelly fights," says Alex.

"And you break it, you bought it. Okay, guys. Let's go."

The store itself is tiny, but packed to the rafters with displays of different bath bombs. They look like the grapefruit section at a grocery store, if grapefruits came in blue and lavender and sparkly. The front window is loaded with artistically arranged translucent soaps, and one wall is devoted to hair products- including a stack of glittering gold things that, upon inspection, turn out to be intended for leaving glitter on your hair and nothing else. The opposite wall is full of 'bubble bars', some of which are swirly-colored, some solid; one stack of pink items is similarly sparkly, and marked TURBO BUBBLE.

Let's not even get into the section of specially selected mud.

[creator_raven]

Raven is torn between the bubble bars and the hair glitter.

Obviously, at least to start with, the glitter wins out.

"They are only one color?"

Raven looks crushed.

"It is, I think, very unfortunate."

[gone_byebye]

"Most people seem to be pretty happy with the overall effect of the gold, sir," says the blonde young woman who appears at Raven's elbow. "Although if you really want to make for an interesting effect, you might want to try one of our dusting powders- here, this is Candy Fluff. Don't eat it, just wear it." She holds out a container; it's scented powder, yeah, but it's got iridescent glittery flakes scattered through it. "If you put a little of this on your hair and then comb it through, you'll have that color glitter in your hair and you can put the other bar on afterwards, plus you'll have the smell the whole time- I'm guessing you're looking for something to go clubbing?"

[creator_raven]

Raven looks almost startled.

"Seals?"

What?

[gone_byebye]

The girl takes it as a joke and laughs. "No, no, I mean down in the Village. Are you looking for glitter to wear when you go out dancing at a nightclub? You look like you might be the raver type. Here, try this."

She thrusts a heart-shaped, faintly slick thing at Raven; it has gold sparkles under the surface.

"Shimmy Shimmy, one of our more popular massage bars. Give it a try."

[creator_raven]

"I am very bad at dancing."

Raven is solemn as he says this.

He also eyes the bar with something like suspicion.

Or is that glee, instead?

"It is for rubbing, then?"

[gone_byebye]

"Yep!" says the woman happily. "Like this."

She picks up another one and rubs it in a circle on her forearm, leaving a goodly trail of slightly slick shininess behind. In amongst the slippery stuff are quite a fair number of golden sparkles.

"Of course, if you'd rather, we have the Glitterbug-" She picks up another item, this one oval in shape. "Which does the same thing but has a slightly different smell, and different colors of glitter. See? Blue and green, here."

[creator_raven]

Raven is fascinated.

He also thinks his version of glittering is better.

It is the problem with vanity, that.

"I am, I think, fond of bugs. They do not often taste so bad."

[gone_byebye]

The girl looks at him blankly. Ray, sensing potential danger, starts to say something.

Joey, however, is way ahead of him. Ray wasn't paying attention to his nephews, after all. This may be how Raven suddenly finds that he has a handful of dark reddish-purple, quivering jelly with great big iridescent flakes all scattered through it.

Uncle Ray only said no jelly fights, not no touching the jelly altogether.

[creator_raven]

Raven grins down at the jelly, shaking it carefully.

"This, I think, is a very fine thing. There are more?"

Someone, perhaps, has nefarious plans.

And he may, in passing, shove a bit of jelly down the back of Joey's shirt.

Raven never promised about jelly fights, after all.

[gone_byebye]

"Oh, yes, those are our shower jellies," says the girl enthusiastically. "A lot of people like to keep those in the fridge so that they can wash up with something cold and-"

Joey makes a squeaking noise and darts off around the display of blackberry ballistics. Alex pokes his head out and says, "I kinda knocked the green one over..."

Ray facepalms and mutters, "How much is the whole tray of whatever it is again?"

"Spank Me With Saplings, you mean?"

".... you named a product that?"

If Raven looks where Joey is trying to get a fistful of the green shower jelly off the floor- it's no good any more, is it? He can play with it, right?- he'll notice quite a few other squishy jellies, in vivid colors. And several stacks of bubble bars covered in glitter- one stack in pinkish gold, one in outright gold, and one stack marked RUBY SLIPPERS covered completely in brilliant red.

"Let me just pay for that and buy a few other things and we'll be out of your hair, I promise..."

[creator_raven]

"They are things that stick, yes?"

And it's not that Raven means to throw the bubble bar.

It just--slips out of his hand.

With great velocity.

Oops.

[gone_byebye]

"well, yes, they-"

Ray hastily grabs a white and gold box off one of the shelves. "This looks about right," he says as the bubble bar bounces off the floor and smacks an unfortunate youngster in the butt. Alex yelps and grabs a chunk of the nearest thing at hand- one of the skin bars- as Joey pitches a blob of greenish stuff back Raven's way.

[creator_raven]

Raven ducks.

Or at least the effect as the same.

Theoretically he was merely bending over to get something from a low-lying shelf.

Really.

The elderly lady nearby looks very surprised when something soft and squishy hits her in the back of the head.

[gone_byebye]

"Exactly how fast can you put my credit card transaction through?" Ray says. "Alex! Joey! Stand down!"

As if.

[creator_raven]

Somewhere in the aisles, someone slips.

Two other children rock through, holding cans of glittery body something or other.

And Raven?

He has made himself almost inobtrusive in one particular corner, and is just laughing.

Loudly.

Oh dear.

[gone_byebye]

There's really only one way to solve this situation, isn't there?

"BOYS! RAVEN! WE'RE GOING TO THE MRS. FIELDS COOKIES STORE NEXT DOOR RIGHT NOW!"

[creator_raven]

That snapping sound?

That is the sound a Raven-neck makes as he turns his head quickly to look at Ray.

"Yes?"

He can move very quickly, when he has a mind to it.

[gone_byebye]

Ray nods. "Out the door. Turn right. Go into the very first door you see. You cannot possibly miss it. Alex, Joey, go with him."

He's still got to pay for the rapidly developing mess, after all.