A trail of aching derrières- next time they'll be more thoughtful

[gone_byebye]

The door opens onto an expanse of asphalt, steel, and glass. Nearby a sign reads:

WELCOME TO WHITE FLINT MALL
BEST PRICES IN THE DC AREA

4708 BETHESDA AVENUE
CHEVY CHASE, MD

It's a big parking lot, with the mall itself only visible off in the distance. Ray gives it the squint-eye before turning to the others. "Okay, people," he says. "This is it. Johnny says it's underground. Egon's best estimates indicate three miles down. Are we good?"

Comments

[stilljustandrew]

*Andrew takes a step forward, his grin smoothing out into something a little less maliciously gleeful and a little more lofty.*

Mr. Peck, I'd just like to apologize for the crudity of my associates' insults.

[gone_byebye]

Peck squirms furiously in Fido's grip. "THANK you," he manages.

[stilljustandrew]

...Because really, you deserve some significantly more elaborate insults. A meticulous and detailed discussion of your dubious ancestry, questionable species, disgusting personal habits, and likely spiritual destination.

Sadly, we were pressed for time. And even if we hadn't been, it's difficult to come up with insults that would do you justice, Mr. Peck. I'm sure you understand.

You miserable vomitous mass.

[wyrd-fox.livejournal.com]

"That's not bad for a rush-job, Andrew," an amused voice drawls. Leaning against the closet door is a pair of spirits. The older-looking one winks.

"I see you stumbled quite nicely into my associates' arms, Peck," Foxtrot says. "I'm certain they've been hospitable."

The small smile breaks into a grin. "Okay, Great God Ray! Do you wanna complete the set? I think the Big Boss needs a little personal tutoring in manners, too."

[gone_byebye]

Ray nods. "If you wouldn't mind, please, Winston?"

Winston accepts the camera, smiling. "No problem, buddy."

"Thank you." Ray steps forward, waving up to Fido briefly before turning his attention back to Peck. "Sir, you might think that I of all people would have the most, best reason to bowl you over with aspersions cast upon your ancestry, your recreational proclivities, your choice of personal attire, your hygiene, and so on and so forth. Lord knows I was sure tempted to think on the subject during those three weeks in Montana, when I wasn't getting over my aversion to the desecration of the printed word by telling myself it was only Jean Auel. Sorely. Tempted."

He rolls his head briefly from side to side.

"But the thing is... I've seen things you've never seen and never will. I've done things you've never done, and will never be able to do. I've talked to people you'd never in a million years be able to even consider speaking to. I've gone toe-to-tentacle with Great Cthulhu and I'm still compos mentis, I've fallen off the Shandor Building twice and survived both times, and I-"

He doesn't even stop talking. He just hauls off and CRACK! slugs Peck across the face.

"-am way better at getting the drop on people than you."

He shakes out his hand and turns to the others. "I don't know about you," Ray says, "but I feel a hundred percent better."

[lt-naraht.livejournal.com]

"I'm sure you do, Ray," Naraht says. "I'm tempted to smack him one myself, but I fear there would not be much left afterward."

Faint sounds of heavy, running feet can be heard echoing down the corridor through the frelling big hole Naraht made in the wall.

"Hmmm...and, as fun as this is, perhaps it's time we moved on."

[stilljustandrew]

Right -- can't do any more damage around here.

*A thoughtful pause.*

Well.

We could.